Throughout these works, the motif of the parent/child relationship takes roughly three forms. First, there is the strong desire for the child's approval by the parent. In the case of father/son relationship, the father is not malicious but merely derelict in his paternal duties owing to his own absorption in the self. The son is left on the outside looking in, wishing to be part of the paternal lineage, looking for guidance, but cannot find it and so becomes resentful of the father. In To the Lighthouse, we see this in the figure of James and Mr. Ramsay.

The second form is an aversion of the child toward the parent, a cosnciousness on the part of the child of the parent's limitations and a rejection of the parent on account of such. The parent becomes a burden and source of shame to the child, who has attained a greater level of insight than the parent and no longer sees herself on the same plane as the parent. The child has no moral or existential crisis about this and there is no impetus to separate oneself, so the only available option is to tolerate the parent. This would be the figure of Elizabeth in Pride and Prejudice and her relationship with her mother.

The last form this relationship takes is a combination of the former two. There is at some point in the relationship a great reverence that is not reciprocated as well as later a great shame as the child becomes aware of the parent's limitations. Perhaps owing to this conflict in atttudes, the child is set on a path toward separation from the parent to try to gain a better understanding of the self before ultimately returning home. This would be Milkman and Macon Jr. in Song of Solomon.

A pattern I noticed throughout all of these works in passing them through the lens of this motif was that the parent always seems to have a domineering or overbearing presence for the child. In To the Lighthouse, Mr. Ramsay is an imposing figure, studiously and quietly studying his books, with an air of importance, dignity, and a readiness to be overly critical of his son. He is described by James in no uncertain terms as a "tyrant," noting the importance of resisting "tyranny." Mrs. Bennet in Pride and Prejudice in her obstinance and meddling in the affairs of Elizabeth despite her vehement protestation is likewise tyrannical in her own particular way. Macon Jr. makes no pretenses about his tyranny, knows he is the head of his household, seeing Milkman as his possession, and only when that tyranny is challenged physically does it dawn on him that he has lost his power over his son.